Swades

Directed by: Ashutosh Gowariker

Starring: Shahrukh Khan

Released: 2004

My rating: destroy every copy ? horrible ? bad ? whatever ? flawed but enjoyable - good ? great ? amazing

Ghar aaja pardesi! That is pretty much what every scene, every dialogue and every frame of Swades screams, pleads and sings. Ghar Aaja and bring your potential with you, stop wasting it on other countries. But to be fair, even though Swades is about India, the message it sends is for all foreigners living beyond their borders, and what could have easily become the stereotypical ?bad West, holy India? film remains a very honest effort to share an idea. If one relates to it or not is personal business. Mohan relates.

Played by Shahrukh Khan at his handsomest best, NASA engineer Mohan, settled comfortably in a luxurious flat in the US, can boast of illustrious career and success, and all he lacks is a bit of love. And for that special kind of love he needs to go back to India, where his old nanny lives in an idylic village of Charanpur. The plan is to relocate her loving arms and care to America, however the longer Mohan stays among villagers and is confronted with their everyday troubles, which previously he was aware of, but never truly gave a thought to, the more he feels a need to do something to bring on the change for the better.

What struck me about Swades the most was that, even though idealistic, it had a very human touch thanks to all the characters, among which we do find certain figures that often fall prey to stereotypes, yet even though they have their peculiarities, they are never turned into caricatures here. Mohan himself too has a very normal vibe, and his interaction with the villagers and their customs give one a good idea about his character. He obviously feels awkward at times, thinks certain issues ridiculous, but he also never shows slightest disdain or disrespect. Finally the villagers and Nasa engineer find a midle-ground comfortable for them all. Finally, while the film criticizes poor living conditions of certain classes of people, there is no sadistic poverty porn included. It is not needed for making a point. At least me and Mohan got it without it.

In many ways I felt Swades was Shahrukh Khan?s Lagaan, just without nasty Englishmen and criket. More realistic, but the problem is the same. It is too damn long. While Lagaan insisted on having a whole criket match (that really does very little or nothing to people like me, who are not familiar with the sport and do not care for it), Swades takes about hour and a half for things to actually tak? shape and start moving along a bit. On the first watch I found the film quite boring, it was only later, when I rewatched it, knowing I shouldn?t expect any great action, that I could appreciate it more and actually notice charming details and nuances that, ultimately, do somehow make up for the lack of happenings. The other minor crib would be that the lead pair doesn?t share any chemistry whatsoever.

All the actors do a very good job, the star of them all being of course the already mentioned SRK. Devoid of any mannerism he is known for, he delivers one of his finest performances ever. His Mohan is charming and adorable (watch out for his ?bathing? scene), and his depression in the serious parts of the film is as real as the laughs he eludes from the viewer in others. I truly wish this Shahrukh would return to us, and serve us another well-fleshed out character he could bring to life, rather than seeing him playing himself, which he had contentedly done so for several years now. Swades is, among other things, also a collection of seemingly ordinary, touching moments. Unlike other movies of the same kind it is not obsessed with parampara, but sees traditions as a fertile soil from which progress should sprout, if treated right. Oh and a special shoutout to Geeta for being a great feminist character!

Aitraaz

Directed by: Abbas Mustan

Starring: Akshay Kumar, Kareena Kapoor, Priyanka Chopra, Amrish Puri

Released: 2004

My rating: destroy every copy ? horrible ? bad ? whatever ? flawed but enjoyable - good ? great ? amazing

Few films are as problematic for me as Aitraaz. On one hand it seemingly adresses the issue of male rape and false accusation, on the other hand it outright condems women who are ambitious and demonizes statements which, taken out of context of the movie, are true and should be respected (i.e. This is my body and my decision if I have a child.) However what could have been a good psychological drama ultimately twists and turns and becomes a clich?d glorification of ?traditional Indian values? in opposition to wicked western ideas of sexual independence. Mind you, Priyanka Chopra?s character, the bearer of the ?western?, is unlikeable and definitely the worst example of any culture one might think of. She is shown as highly manipulative and vengeful. Still I resented how she was made an unredeemable demon, while Akshay Kumar an innocent angel. But as the poster suggests, it is a ?women?s world? and men who do not conform suffer (ha!).

Whereas Priyanka in the film never gets a chance to elaborate on her motivation (unless one is ready to accept she is simply a basic and greedy bitch), Akshay plays the martyr with the help of the law-student-turned-domestic Kareena Kapoor (with really weird blond hair). His character, though, makes few questionable moves himself. He lies to an unknown girl because he likes her. He deceives her to win her affections. Fortunately for him she finds it cute and loveable, had it been me he would have a shoe in his face. He has a history of hitting women when angry. Upon Kareena introducing herself as Priya Saxena he only manages to stammer ?Priya Sex.? In other words veritable Prince Charming.

Alongside this suffering Romeo, Priyanka and Kareena represent the already mentioned two poles ? the devil in anything not sanskaari versus Indian goodness, innocence and tradition. Heck, Kareena is even FULLY clothed while dancing on the beach, while bacground dancers are in bikini. The greatest difference between them however lies in their reaction towards pregnancy. Kareena is happy. Priyanka gets an abortion. One would have though that by 2004 Bollywood has outgrown the formula of the angelic/devious extremes, but unfortunately that was not the case.

On the whole Aitraaz comes as awkward. From Kareena?s hair colour to Priyanka?s seductive rolling on the floor. And the whole choreography. In the end I cannot shake the feeling that the whole movie did not really care for exploitation of men, and only used it as a veil for yet another film that demonizes women. The double standarts set by Akshay?s character are obvious too. He has no problem with oggling over a bikini-clad woman on the beach, but is insulted when other men react similarly to her when they see her photoshoot. Maybe I am wrong. That?s why the film remains problematic. Even if it was not, however, it would be a mediocre venture, with outdated sets, forgettable music, sloppy script and half-hearted performances. The only one truly into the character was the vamp - Priyanka Chopra, whose acting chops were not great back then. She is utterly beautiful in the movie still, and already showing the future Priyanka, who would not be shy of experimenting with her roles by taking a negative lead.

Devotional dance by the righteous to close this review.

Swades

Directed by: Ashutosh Gowariker

Starring: Shahrukh Khan

Released: 2004

My rating: destroy every copy ? horrible ? bad ? whatever ? flawed but enjoyable - good ? great ? amazing

Ghar aaja pardesi! That is pretty much what every scene, every dialogue and every frame of Swades screams, pleads and sings. Ghar Aaja and bring your potential with you, stop wasting it on other countries. But to be fair, even though Swades is about India, the message it sends is for all foreigners living beyond their borders, and what could have easily become the stereotypical ?bad West, holy India? film remains a very honest effort to share an idea. If one relates to it or not is personal business. Mohan relates.

Played by Shahrukh Khan at his handsomest best, NASA engineer Mohan, settled comfortably in a luxurious flat in the US, can boast of illustrious career and success, and all he lacks is a bit of love. And for that special kind of love he needs to go back to India, where his old nanny lives in an idylic village of Charanpur. The plan is to relocate her loving arms and care to America, however the longer Mohan stays among villagers and is confronted with their everyday troubles, which previously he was aware of, but never truly gave a thought to, the more he feels a need to do something to bring on the change for the better.

What struck me about Swades the most was that, even though idealistic, it had a very human touch thanks to all the characters, among which we do find certain figures that often fall prey to stereotypes, yet even though they have their peculiarities, they are never turned into caricatures here. Mohan himself too has a very normal vibe, and his interaction with the villagers and their customs give one a good idea about his character. He obviously feels awkward at times, thinks certain issues ridiculous, but he also never shows slightest disdain or disrespect. Finally the villagers and Nasa engineer find a midle-ground comfortable for them all. Finally, while the film criticizes poor living conditions of certain classes of people, there is no sadistic poverty porn included. It is not needed for making a point. At least me and Mohan got it without it.

In many ways I felt Swades was Shahrukh Khan?s Lagaan, just without nasty Englishmen and criket. More realistic, but the problem is the same. It is too damn long. While Lagaan insisted on having a whole criket match (that really does very little or nothing to people like me, who are not familiar with the sport and do not care for it), Swades takes about hour and a half for things to actually tak? shape and start moving along a bit. On the first watch I found the film quite boring, it was only later, when I rewatched it, knowing I shouldn?t expect any great action, that I could appreciate it more and actually notice charming details and nuances that, ultimately, do somehow make up for the lack of happenings. The other minor crib would be that the lead pair doesn?t share any chemistry whatsoever.

All the actors do a very good job, the star of them all being of course the already mentioned SRK. Devoid of any mannerism he is known for, he delivers one of his finest performances ever. His Mohan is charming and adorable (watch out for his ?bathing? scene), and his depression in the serious parts of the film is as real as the laughs he eludes from the viewer in others. I truly wish this Shahrukh would return to us, and serve us another well-fleshed out character he could bring to life, rather than seeing him playing himself, which he had contentedly done so for several years now. Swades is, among other things, also a collection of seemingly ordinary, touching moments. Unlike other movies of the same kind it is not obsessed with parampara, but sees traditions as a fertile soil from which progress should sprout, if treated right. Oh and a special shoutout to Geeta for being a great feminist character!

Aitraaz

Directed by: Abbas Mustan

Starring: Akshay Kumar, Kareena Kapoor, Priyanka Chopra, Amrish Puri

Released: 2004

My rating: destroy every copy ? horrible ? bad ? whatever ? flawed but enjoyable - good ? great ? amazing

Few films are as problematic for me as Aitraaz. On one hand it seemingly adresses the issue of male rape and false accusation, on the other hand it outright condems women who are ambitious and demonizes statements which, taken out of context of the movie, are true and should be respected (i.e. This is my body and my decision if I have a child.) However what could have been a good psychological drama ultimately twists and turns and becomes a clich?d glorification of ?traditional Indian values? in opposition to wicked western ideas of sexual independence. Mind you, Priyanka Chopra?s character, the bearer of the ?western?, is unlikeable and definitely the worst example of any culture one might think of. She is shown as highly manipulative and vengeful. Still I resented how she was made an unredeemable demon, while Akshay Kumar an innocent angel. But as the poster suggests, it is a ?women?s world? and men who do not conform suffer (ha!).

Whereas Priyanka in the film never gets a chance to elaborate on her motivation (unless one is ready to accept she is simply a basic and greedy bitch), Akshay plays the martyr with the help of the law-student-turned-domestic Kareena Kapoor (with really weird blond hair). His character, though, makes few questionable moves himself. He lies to an unknown girl because he likes her. He deceives her to win her affections. Fortunately for him she finds it cute and loveable, had it been me he would have a shoe in his face. He has a history of hitting women when angry. Upon Kareena introducing herself as Priya Saxena he only manages to stammer ?Priya Sex.? In other words veritable Prince Charming.

Alongside this suffering Romeo, Priyanka and Kareena represent the already mentioned two poles ? the devil in anything not sanskaari versus Indian goodness, innocence and tradition. Heck, Kareena is even FULLY clothed while dancing on the beach, while bacground dancers are in bikini. The greatest difference between them however lies in their reaction towards pregnancy. Kareena is happy. Priyanka gets an abortion. One would have though that by 2004 Bollywood has outgrown the formula of the angelic/devious extremes, but unfortunately that was not the case.

On the whole Aitraaz comes as awkward. From Kareena?s hair colour to Priyanka?s seductive rolling on the floor. And the whole choreography. In the end I cannot shake the feeling that the whole movie did not really care for exploitation of men, and only used it as a veil for yet another film that demonizes women. The double standarts set by Akshay?s character are obvious too. He has no problem with oggling over a bikini-clad woman on the beach, but is insulted when other men react similarly to her when they see her photoshoot. Maybe I am wrong. That?s why the film remains problematic. Even if it was not, however, it would be a mediocre venture, with outdated sets, forgettable music, sloppy script and half-hearted performances. The only one truly into the character was the vamp - Priyanka Chopra, whose acting chops were not great back then. She is utterly beautiful in the movie still, and already showing the future Priyanka, who would not be shy of experimenting with her roles by taking a negative lead.

Devotional dance by the righteous to close this review.

Envy

***DISCLAIMER*** The following review is entirely my opinion. If you comment (which I encourage you to do) be respectful. If you don't agree with my opinion, that's fine. To each their own. These reviews are not meant to be statements of facts or endorsements, I am just sharing my opinions and my perspective when watching the film and is not meant to reflect how these films should be viewed. Finally, the reviews are given on a scale of 0-5. 0, of course, being unwatchable. 1, being terrible. 2, being not great. 3, being okay. 4, being great and 5, being epic! And if you enjoy these reviews feel free to share them and follow the blog or follow me on Twitter (@RevRonster) for links to my reviews and the occasional live-Tweet session of the movie I'm watching! My envy comes from the fact that people were doing more important and entertaining things while I watched this one.

Envy ? 1 out of 5

Despite my fondness of Ben Stiller, Jack Black, and Christopher Walken (true story, I once performed a rendition of Shakespeare?s play that shall not be named doing an impression of Walken the entire time?it was as horrible as it sounds) but, even with this fact of enjoyment over these actors, I never jumped at the opportunity to watch Envy. In fact, I heard such horrible things about it that I put it on my Netflix queue to watch later. I never jumped at the opportunity to view it and every time it came up for delivery, I pushed it back towards the bottom of my queue. However, this last weekend, I gave in and watched it and, I realized, I could have waited infinitely longer.

They are in a car together and there wasn't a "sing along to the radio" scene?
ROBBED!!!

Tim Dingman (Ben Stiller) and Nick Vanderpark (Jack Black) are stuck in a job that feels like it is going nowhere. Nick is a dreamer and is always trying to come up with the next big thing but Tim lectures him that he just needs to focus and do the best with where he?s at. One day, Nick comes up with an idea call the "Vapoorizer," an invention that, when sprayed on dog droppings, will make said feces simply disappear and eliminate the need to pick up dog waste all together. After Nick gets the product made, he becomes a millionaire and Tim is left to his soul-crushing job alone and must look in on the fabulous world of his best friend?and realize that Nick gave him an opportunity to get in on the ground floor but passed on it. Soon, Tim?s jealousy gets the better of him and he loses his job, sees his family ready to leave him, and finds himself being pushed towards revenge by a man who calls himself the J-Man (Christopher Walken).

This is an actual shot from the film...it's not a metaphor, I swear.

I had to watch Zoolander after watching this to remind
me why I am a fan of Ben Stiller.

Envy was pretty much panned entirely by critics and audiences when it came out and was so bad that it was going to be destined to only be released directly on video but was saved in the last minute and sent to theaters for nothing else than to try and make some of the money back. I remember thinking that with Stiller, Black, and Walken in the film, how could it really be that bad? However, the negative reviews still kept me from this film for an entire decade?shit, Stiller and Black actually publically apologized for how bad this film was. Granted, I didn?t think this film was absolutely atrocious but, I have to agree, this movie isn?t good.

Okay, so the movie is literally beating a dead horse...

The main problem with this film is it is just not funny. Yes, comedy is subjective and what one person finds hilarious, another may find mind-numbing, stupid, or even offensive. However, I just couldn?t laugh at this film. Once, at one point with Walken, I gave a small chuckle but the rest of the film was just me sitting in silence. Envy wants to be a dark comedy and have you find humor is locations that normally aren?t a breeding ground for comedy?for example, a major plot point involves Tim?s jealousy releasing itself in the form of drinking and, in his drunken stupor, he kills Nick?s prize horse. Dark comedies are already an acquired taste but this film just couldn?t tune in its humor to make these darker moments work. These scenes come off like first drafts of jokes and gags without any consideration of refining them. A majority of the time, scenes come off looking like someone flailing about desperately to try and get a pity laugh and it makes too much of the film sad and kinda embarrassing.

I still love you even though you were in this film, Walken.

Well, if Walken and Stiller form a band, I already have
their first album cover ready.

Finally, the cast really just looked like they didn?t give a shit. Black and Walken seem to be given their best with what little comedy the script has in it but Stiller just looks like he doesn?t care. I found this odd because Stiller can play the victim quite well but here, it just looked like he didn?t try. Additionally, the wives of Tim and Nick feel a tad superfluous due to their limited appearances in the film (there?s even a side-story that features Nick?s wife Debbie?played by the talented Amy Poehler?running for office but nothing ever really concrete or interesting results from it). Tim?s wife is played by Rachel Weisz but with the lack of any intrigue the character has, having the talented Weisz play the role felt ultimately pointless.  Most of the time she comes off like background decoration of part of the set.

In reality, Tim's wife could have been played by a person with a bag on their
head and you never would have noticed.  That's how little they do with her
in the story.

Pointless also describes the story and plot as the film feels like it is just meandering around an outline rather than an actual story or script. I already mentioned how Poehler?s character has a side-story that just sorta fizzles out with no real fanfare but the whole movie comes off this way. The basics of what is happening is there and you get that Tim is jealous but the movie never really makes you feel like you are going through Tim?s raging and depressing jealousy. It just feels like you are seeing certain segments of this journey and any real development the story needs for the characters is just tossed to the side and forgotten about.

Well, if it's being sold on TV...I'll take 15!

Envy could have easily been a decent dark comedy about one man?s jealously over his friend?s success but the film feels like it has no idea how comedy works, doesn?t really go into any satisfying details of its story and plot, and the cast barely appears to have any interest. I pushed this one off for 10 years but I could have easily pushed it off another decade or just never bothered to watch it at all.